Today is Kels’ last high school ARD meeting. When I was mentally going through my schedule in the shower this morning this particular appointment hit me like a ton of bricks and I began to cry. This is a milestone, you know. There were points throughout the last few years where I had serious doubts as to whether or not this beautiful, young woman of mine would get the opportunity to “walk the stage” for her graduation. Oh, no doubt – I always envisioned her with a bright and productive future. Always. But high school graduation didn’t play a part in it – possibly a GED or an alternative certification. But a high school diploma? Not likely when the surgeries were coming as fast and furious as the seizures. Or when most of every year of high school has been missed due to health issues associated with a diagnosis of epilepsy such as hers. In just a few short months, however, my daughter will proudly walk the stage, take her hard-earned diploma and move on to the next stage. And the final step begins with today’s ARD to ensure that she can stroll proudly to that moment.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Wow – what a long time since my last entry. So many things have happened.
My mother passed away on September 15. By the grace of God, I happened to be able to see her the night before and tell her how much I loved her. By all accounts, I should not have been there – I had no plans to go up, but Dad had mentioned that he was concerned because mom had stopped eating and drinking a couple of days prior. I told him that I would try to drive up on Monday after work, but Kelsey ended up having a seizure early Monday morning, which meant that we had to drug her up to prevent clusters. Because she was all drugged up, I stayed at home with her on Monday. When she woke up, I decided that we would drive to see mom and dad; I will forever be grateful for the Spirit that led me to do so. Once I saw her, I knew that we only had hours left with her, so I badgered my sister into coming to see her since she hadn’t planned on driving up for quite a few weeks. I very baldly told her that if she wanted to see mom alive again, she needed to come that day.
Long story; short version – we all told mom at some point on Monday that we loved her very very much and that it was okay for her to let go and run to God – that we would miss her, but that she didn’t need to worry about us. And you know what? She did. She let go and she ran with all her might to the One who could heal her and make her whole. She ran to the One that has to hold us now and comfort us in our loss. She ran and ran and I believe that as He met her on her journey to Him, she felt good and whole and well for the first time in many many years.